First Let’s Play: I’ve got a long way to go.

I’ve wanted to do a Youtube channel forever. I’ve had this web address and the Youtube channel The Subpar Nerd for years. I’ve just always been super busy with work, school, family or other commitments. I’ve uploaded random videos to the channel over the years. However, today or yesterday really, I got serious. I already had all the programs I was gonna use from previous efforts at this. I opened OBS and I actually filmed myself. I was awkward.

I quickly realized I don’t know what to say. I’d either blab endlessly about inane bullshit or I’d go quiet. The end result felt a little stilted at the time I was recording, but I pressed on. I made a half hour video and saved it. Afterwards, I initially felt dumb. Why did I want to do this if I was so bad at it? I don’t have the patter or the energy of my favorite youtubers. Why bother?

At work I had time to think about it though. This is a new thing for me. While I’ve done plenty of live theater and choir in my years, I’ve never done what is basically on demand solo improv. A lot of this is just reacting naturally to the game and feeling confident to speak what you’re seeing and thinking aloud. I generally don’t do a running commentary while I play solo but now I will. Practice makes perfect. I just need to do it if I want to get better. Maybe I need to stream, where I can possibly get reactions and interact with an audience.

I will say, actually listening back while I try to edit it, it’s not as bad as I feared. I’m no pro. But self consciousness is a killer. Gotta push past. If you’d like to watch my first video of my first let’s play, it’s below. Feel free to click through and subscribe for more. I think I’m going to also do some non gaming content about the creative learning process and my thoughts and feelings on it. I’d love if you dropped a constructive comment on the video, or even told me that you love it. (You can lie. 🙂 )